It is, what it is.

Its been a bad day, you've been looking back
And all you can see is everything you wish you could take back
All your mistakes, a world of regrets
All of those moments you would rather forget

You know you can't stay right where you fell
The hardest part is forgiving yourself
But let's take a walk into today
And don't let your past get in the way


Well that was the hardest thing I think I will ever have to do. I guess I finaly realized, that a part of growing up, is making sacrafices for yourself, to make other people happy. Im not usualy one to think about other people before myself to be honest. But i think this was a wakeup call. To remind me, I am almost an adult, and Im going to have to start acting like one, my child hood is coming to an end, now theres nowhere to go but up. A chance to start over, start new, a fresh beginning, with new people, city, school, and situations. But im telling you this, It wasn't sapose to hurt this bad. Trying to help someone else, was not sapose to make me feel like this. But i guess if its what you have to do to help other people, then it is what it is. Even if it just put me through the worst pain of my life. I honestly never new the salt from your tears could burn your flesh so bad on your skin if you already have a cut. Like, my tears actuly BURNT my face, like, its all red blotchy, and stings. But i guess its the price you pay when you screw up bad and find yourself at the end with no way to fix it this time. This is why I don't care. This is why I don't let people in. This is what always happenes to me. You put people in my life until I learn to care, and when i finaly do, you go and take them from me. This is why I hurt; You are the reason. You do this to me everytime. You think I would of learned by now. But i finaly thought things were different, they were starting to look up for me in highschool. But then you go, and remind me once again, that you give and take away. But this is why I gave up on you, this is why I hate you. This is what you do to me. So I hope your happy, because you've sucessfuly managed to ruin my life once again, so thanks. Thanks alot.

But now its time to move on, to let go, and to imbrace the new life coming to me in a couple of months. If i don't stop acting like a kid now, I never will.

I just really never knew it could hurt this bad. It really wasn't sapose to, i was sapose to be fine. I was sapose to not care. I guess things don't always work out the way I plan them eh? But it is what it is, and it is just history.